WHY?
And why never on a weekend, unless there are plans that involve travel and/or reservations and/or prepaid anything?
Always Late Mommy was No Show Mommy today for work. I have only have two weeks left before I start my new job, I'll be gone tomorrow for yet another MRI (which will be a write off - they have to sedate me because of my claustrophobia - will be f'd up for the day), AND Monday is a holiday here, I'm beginning to feel panicked about not getting things done.
This is the opposite of what the white coats have instructed me to be doing. I'm supposed to be "relaxing" and "taking time for myself" and "sleeping" (imagine me doing air quotes while you read that). And a bunch of other impossible bullshit for a mom, ahem, "stuff".
I remember when my main neurologist told me this and I laughed at him. Hysterically.
He gave me the "look". I've gotten that look many times before, so I'm used to it now. The look that says "you are not taking this seriously" or "we can't help you if you refuse to help yourself" or "you are not listening and you will be sorry".
I do understand and I am listening. I'm just not hearing anything that is remotely feasible for a working mom with a dependent parent and a husband who, well, tries.
I'm getting to my point, bear with me, I was up at 2am...
So I am overtired from being up all night with a screaming child (not just sick, but screaming in pain), my husband is not going to be able to handle this so I've just called into work and feel incredibly guilty for cancelling four appointments, my kid is crying out to me to make his ear stop hurting "please mommy please", I made the mistake of checking my email (48 new messages - great), and I am freaking about very soon being stuffed in a very tiny space for 90 minutes with no way to get out (you are strapped in).
It wasn't so much that I had reached my limit, I had gone so far past it I had almost lapped myself.
And then my wee man looks at me through his tears and stuffy nose and says, "I nub new mum, happy valtines day". And miraculously falls asleep:
And THEN my husband gives me one of the best valentines presents ever. It was folded up like a note that a boy would pass to you in school.
And I FINALLY get a cup of coffee.
All is right with the world again. And it didn't take yoga or meditation or "me time" or deep breathing or any of that bullshit.
They can take their "look" and...
I remember when my main neurologist told me this and I laughed at him. Hysterically.
He gave me the "look". I've gotten that look many times before, so I'm used to it now. The look that says "you are not taking this seriously" or "we can't help you if you refuse to help yourself" or "you are not listening and you will be sorry".
I do understand and I am listening. I'm just not hearing anything that is remotely feasible for a working mom with a dependent parent and a husband who, well, tries.
I'm getting to my point, bear with me, I was up at 2am...
So I am overtired from being up all night with a screaming child (not just sick, but screaming in pain), my husband is not going to be able to handle this so I've just called into work and feel incredibly guilty for cancelling four appointments, my kid is crying out to me to make his ear stop hurting "please mommy please", I made the mistake of checking my email (48 new messages - great), and I am freaking about very soon being stuffed in a very tiny space for 90 minutes with no way to get out (you are strapped in).
It wasn't so much that I had reached my limit, I had gone so far past it I had almost lapped myself.
And then my wee man looks at me through his tears and stuffy nose and says, "I nub new mum, happy valtines day". And miraculously falls asleep:
And THEN my husband gives me one of the best valentines presents ever. It was folded up like a note that a boy would pass to you in school.
And I FINALLY get a cup of coffee.
All is right with the world again. And it didn't take yoga or meditation or "me time" or deep breathing or any of that bullshit.
They can take their "look" and...
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